Gross

Things continue to go badly, and on top of it I "relapsed" and attempted to get cute and make a big score outside my bankroll.

Today I came home and settled into an $11 SNG. The first one was going along pretty average until I picked up AKh. I had had a couple of my raised hands thus far miss or be 2nd best, so I smooth called the initial EP raise. I just wanted to see a flop. The flop came a fairly nice looking A-high with a couple of hearts. The raiser bet, and I decided to call and take one off. It was not a heart. At this point the raiser pushes all-in, and I know he's got aces. I thought about it briefly, and thought if I'm playing outside my bankroll, I might as well gamble, and I did. And he had aces. And I missed. 9th place.

So, continuing in my disfunction, I popped open another $11. I *really* like the way it was playing. I *know* I'm better than these players, so I just had to get another taste and see if I could reverse my fate. This one went along really well, and the table didn't know what to think of me. I didn't even have to show down a hand until blinds were 50/100. And at this point I had pushed at least 4 times. Finally I push again w/A6, and the first time they see my cards I'm doubling up against 4s. This propeled me from 6th out of 6 to 2nd. That's how close this tourney was. I then bounced around between 1st and 2nd for a while, but my stack was so small compared to the chips in play, I knew I was just a couple downed players from last. So I pick up A8o UTG with blinds at 150/300. I feel like I'd commit myself anyway if I raised here, and if nobody called an all-in, I'd have free blinds. I got called by a shorter stack w/KJ, and the flop came xJK. There goes half of it. In the big blind I then doubled up another short stack with A2s against a pocket pair. No go. Now I'm in the small blind for less than the small blind and my 78 can't outrun A 10. 6th place it is!

I was simultaneously in a $5.50 SNG, where I picked up the first real hand I'd seen, KK. I raise it up to 300 in EP, get re-raised to 600 in LP, and I just got that feeling. Anyway, there's no way I'm getting away from this here, so I push, and get called by the pocket aces. Had to be, right?

So I'm now in "cool down" mode, playing for a little pride since that's 5 straight non-cashes, and running a $5.50 and a $2.20. Wouldn't you know it, in the $2.20 I'm a MASSIVE chip lead when I'm holding 77, and on a Q73 flop, get it all in against QJ and 33. A lady on the turn gave them both quad draws, but I amazingly managed to hold up. Thanks for that out of this world double takeout hand in the cheapest possible tournament.

What the hell am I doing going up a level when I've been on my high horse about bankroll management and can barely be excused playing even the $5.50s? Well, I just kinda felt like I wanted to take a chance and make something happen. It sucks, because as I said I love the way the $11 level plays, but I can't say that I played my best. Nor did I get the least bit lucky. Now I'm down in the dumper with an even bigger hill to climb. But this isn't a tilt-induced tailspin. I just took a shot and missed. Back to the grind I guess. I'll get there eventually.

--tick tock tick tock tick--

So I ended up winning the $2.20...

...and I ended up winning the $5.50 in a seriously confidence building performance (even getting aces cracked by Q7o)...

...which puts me down just 20 cents for the evening.

The poker gods are smiling on me for some reason. And as I like to say when I get bailed out, I'll take it.