This Post Brought to you by Sofa King

I am Sofa King tired of losing and running bad. As of about today (it was exactly a year ago I got my Macbook Pro, and ever since my portable poker playing has experienced rare moments of joy), its been A YEAR of running Sofa King terrible, save for 3-4 strings of 3-4 days where I'd run "normal", and then I think there was one string of 3-4 days a couple months back where I actually ran "good" and ran my online bankroll up over $250, only to find my way back to the basement the next day.

After not having played since before I left for San Antonio on 4/27, I was Sofa King refreshed, rejuvinated, and ready to hit the felt and play well. I'd been reading a decent little pre-release book that someone asked me to take a look at, I'd been reading blogs and picking up on strategy and reading about other people's good fortune, and my love of the game was rejuvinated. I was aware of mistakes I'd been making while trying to experiment with more LAG play, and wanted to get back to basics and play the way I've been successful in the past, and hone in a strong TAG game. Make good decisions, make good plays, and just let it all flow nice and naturally. I played a SNG on Tuesday and after struggling early, played really well to end up taking it down. So far, so good.

Then last night I had plans to get in and go deep in the $20k Guarantee at 6 Central on Stars. Before I know it I'm deep...into my stack...w/AK where the board comes QQKxA, on a 3-flush board. After raising preflop and betting every street and getting called to the tune of about 1/3 of my stack, I get jammed on on the river and see no way around folding. He either has the Q or made the flush on the river. Here we go again. I eventually double back above the starting stack, only to move tables and find AK again. I raise preflop and get a caller in the BB. Flop comes QQx. I c-bet, thinking I'm probably in pretty good shape still, and get slow called. I hesitantly bet bigger on the 10 turn, thinking I can get a fishing mid-PP to fold, and get called even slower. The river comes, and I quickly make the same bet as the turn making it look like I don't want to lose him, and I'm quickly called again. BB shows down AQ. Nice play, me. It doesn't matter what my bets make me look like...there was no way I was getting this guy to fold. But seriously, how unlucky is that?! Sofa King unlucky. So I've got this guy dominated PF, he calls my raise for a discount in the BB, then flops trips. He could have SOFA KING MANY hands that don't have a Q in them that would make him call my Flop and Turn bets, but no...he's got one of the other two Qs. From this point, I actually did chip up to an almost average stack by my AK actually holding up against 67o, and then my 88 holding up against 77h on a 5h6h2h board, but found myself back in the basement releatively quickly when I made a couple of pretty damn decent hands, bet them, and got raised or showed down losers. Of course a pretty damn decent hand for me doesn't stand a chance against 8 other hands at a poker table. I really should fold with anything less than a set. I eventually go broke when I've got K7o in the SB and its folded to me, I open jam 7 big blinds, and get called in the BB w/K10s. Lemme spell this out for you. I've got K-high and one hand to beat, and not only can I *not* beat it, but I'm dominated, *and* I find a guy who's willing to call off 7 big blinds and more than half his stack w/K10s. I don't know if that's an excellent call or a terrible call, but one thing's for certain, its an enfuriating call. GG me. Sofa King screwed. Oh, and BTW, its my 10th straight MTT non-cash.

I went on to play 4 SNGs, and the beating continued. Tons of pocket pairs but not one set. If I have KQ, an Ace flops, if I have AK, a Q flops, if I have AQ, a K flops, if I have 10s or Js overs flop, or better yet someone has QQ, and my suited connectors whiffed or flopped monster draws that never got home. Almost without fail. Every time I *did* make some semblance of a hand, I'd bet 2/3 of the pot and get raised. And when you bet 2/3 of the pot in a 5.50 SNG and get raised...you're beat. Every time I gave someone 2:1 on the turn with their flush draw instead of the 4:1 they needed and they called, the flush came on the river. And naturally, every time I managed to make a monster, everyone folded. I ended up with my money in the middle once w/top pair vs. middle pair, and obviously his trips came on the turn. In another, with A9s vs. KJ by the turn I had the lead, plus a flush draw and gutshot, but obviously his 4-6 outer came. In another, I raise from M/LP w/9c9, get three callers, flop comes J-high all clubs. I move in for size of the pot, button rejams, and shows QcJ, for top pair and the blocker club. I admittedly got my money in bad...but come on! Does it have to be *that bad* 6-handed?! And in another, 4-handed, the shortstack calls on the button w/97o and I end up doubling him w/95 on a 794-8 rainbow board. Probably a tilty call of his all-in raise by me, but after getting raised w/decent hands all night, I struggled to see how I was beat 4-handed in this spot and was Sofa King tired of getting pushed around. I then open jammed my 4xBB stack w/76o from the SB, and duh...the BB has A6o. See above.

I left in shambles no less than three goals I had set for myself when I started. Namely, don't run plays/spew chips when I'm beat (see: AK vs. AQ on QQx board hand), don't get sucked into other players' traps (see: AK vs. XX on QQKxA 3-flush board), and don't, under any circumstances, make that "gutsy" or "heroic" call when my gut is telling me I'm beat (see: 59 vs 79 hand). And while, yes, I broke these rules on my own, its simply because I never get the chance to run that good bluff, when I make big hands I'm beat, and when I should be safe I never am. Honorable mention for broken rules were don't get run over/be the aggressor, always play your position, and quit limping so much. I thought I made some pretty good preflop decisions in spots where I'd normally be spewy, and I thought I made some pretty good plays that I just ended up unlucky in. But, see, that's the key. I'm Sofa King unlucky!

I'm also tired of the level I'm playing at. I feel like a lot of the time I'm setting up the right table image and making the right plays, and have a very systematic approach to the whole thing, and then some idiot who either isn't paying attention or is doing a bad impersonation of a LAG throws all that out the window and pops up and screws me. Like when I open jammed K7 in the SB into K10s in the BB. After showing down nothing but winners and folding all the live long day, I jammed 7 BBs and over half of the BBs stack, and this guy is willing to call w/K10. Where is he when I have a *real* hand?! Of course then when I open jam something like A9 in the cutoff or button, looking to actually double, the SB wakes up with AJ. Sofa King sick. I can't remember, but I think I blogged about recently when I open jammed on the button or SB w/AK and the BB wakes up w/AA. Anyway, I just feel like at my level there are some players who don't know jack and/or don't care and are doing horrible impersonations of a LAG player, and some, like myself, who are really trying to better themselves and that make really strong TAG plays. And then somewhere in between, there is actually the LAG who is making a strong go of it. The problem is, no matter who they are, I'm the guinea pig. I'm the guy w/AA that the LAG flops the nuts against after I raise and he calls me w/56o after I've seen his incapability to keep his hands out of the cookie jar, and I'm also the guy who open raises/jams in position/resteals against the strong TAG who is capable of folding, only this time he's actually got a monster.

Yes, it happens to all of us. But I guaran-damn-tee you it doesn't happen to you as much as it happens to me. I generally try and take the high road and keep the bitching to a minimum (no, seriously...I do), but now I'm officially whining. I'm Sofa King tired of it. I'm the Mike Matusow of bloggers. There...I said it.

Now I know some of you are reading this and seeing leaks galore and percieving this as me thinking my game has no room for improvement and that my big hands will never be beat. But that's not the case at all. I've got a long ways to go, and I know that. I even am fully aware of several of the mistakes in hands I pointed out above, and several of my "conceptual" mistakes such as needing to make plays WITHOUT actual hands and it doesn't matter how many people are left, anything short of the nuts can still be beat. Problem is, I'm so busy fighting tangible uphill battles, I never have a comfortable enough stack/bankroll to even get to a conceptual level. I'm perpetually recovering from the last bad beat and don't get to put it on cruise control to work on sniffing out bluffs, running plays, accumulating chips. I'm always in disaster recovery mode. I'm just so sick of it. I study and I practice and I study and I practice, and I get my money in good, and I make my opponents make mistakes, but my poker life is a perpetual bout with negative variance. Its almost as if instead of there being variance from hand to hand in the cards that are dealt, there's variance from player to player in ones ability to run normally, and I'm the 30% and under. The sick part is that I know there's just as much mathematical backbone to that theory as there is to card variance. Maybe for me it doesn't "always even out", and on the opposite end of the spectrum, there's a guy that sucks out equally as disproportionate as I am able to hold up with the best hand. I just don't want to come to terms with that...I love the game too much.

So now, as you may be able to tell, I'm Sofa King pissed off and depressed and down on the game again. My 9 days off and good attitude about finally making a go of this hobby was completely ruined over the course of 4 hours, 1 MTT, and 4 SNGs. So now, with my sub-$50 bankroll AGAIN...I'll have to pick myself up by the bootstraps and give it another go...AGAIN.

Sorry for the vent. A guy can only take so much.

Thnanks to Sofa King for their sponsorship of this post. I'm out.